I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize