I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
