this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
