this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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