Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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