I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
