"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
