Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
