Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
