i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
