nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
