Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
