bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She's the barista slut.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
