I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
