halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize