I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
