what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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