So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
