The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
