no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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