You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
tell me about the eggs
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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