yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
