I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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