I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
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