some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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