if you like me you must not know who I am
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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