some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
That was an excessively violent trivia night
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
