I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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