They should really pass out barf bags in church
Swine flu is the new snow day.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
