Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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