Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
