he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Drake has all the answers
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize