Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
