So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
