oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
