you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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