A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
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