There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
