Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
