I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
