her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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