Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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