My first STD was from a foam party
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
