he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize
