halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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