i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize