my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
