Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
