I'm going to jail i love you
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
