Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize