i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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