And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize