How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
